Sunday, October 3, 2010

Shiftopus strikes again

No.. its not septopus. Never heard of anything about a septopus except the ever thrilling short story of Satyajit Ray which tells a tale about its hunger (well, I should exclude those totally unrelated google search outcomes as well). Yeah, you are an ignorant flathead if you haven't read the story yet (non-Bengali folks, ignore this sentence); my apology for the accidental rudeness!

Obeying conventional storytelling guidelines for below-average writers (which is obeyed by myself and only myself) , I should introduce my very few readers (why do I even bother to keep a blog!!! Naturally, people have better ways to spend time rather than reading trash texts) with shiftopus aka yours truly. He believed himself to be a stone hard to move (physically, of course. Mentally he is very flexible..agrees with almost everything without much resistance) until he was driven by the ever powerful romanticism of physics resulting the initiation of the first shift. Hence began the shift phase..

Shiftopus hoped that he had to shift for once..and only once. North Kolkata being his primary second most favourite place to live (no point for guessing which place qualifies to be number one), he did everything in his power (and made others do whatever possible in their power) to keep himself in between Tala and Park Street, undoubtedly his secondary second most favourite place. Thanks to his uncle and aunt - they made it possible and tolerated all his insanity and idiosyncrasies for three long years that shiftopus wasted in the name of studying physics and ultimately ending up having a huge number of books in possession without learning anything. But all good things come to an end. Even when he made sure that he would stay at Kolkata for farther studies (the dirty works he had to do are still secrets and details are suppressed for his safety from his near and dear ones), at the end of those sunlit years (and the years in which Kolkata and St. Xavier's gave him the most) he found himself at the edge of another shift that took him to a place which repelled him most - far south. It didn't go well with him, of course, for he had to leave in six months and shift again. And it was the time he started looking for visible physical changes in himself that could prove that he was changing into a separate class of dinosaur that has to migrate time to time searching availability of food! He did not find those back scales and jaw-bones growing, but it could only mean that he did not have a big enough mirror ("Mirror mirror on the wall, who is the first ever dinosaur evolved from humans?"). But this time it was small. A spatially long translation isn't much..specially when it takes you back to north.

Shiftopus's good time came to an end a few months ago when he realised that he had to find a new place soon. And he had a bad feeling about this. His nightmare came true, a shift from north to south took place a couple of days ago. After four long and happy years, circumstances drove him again to the place he loathed. Stability in the past four years made him almost forget his dinosaur-doubt, but truth is truth! His tooth must have become sharp and shiny, his back must have become scaled and rough-skinned and his buttock must have been giving shelter to an all new and powerful tail! People can't see them because he doesn't talk much and always keeps himself covered with things known as cloth when in public.

Sigh! Shiftopus strikes again...